In which I give birth to my son standing up in a parkade

He's here! He's here!

Allow me to introduce you to the newest member of the clan: Joseph Arthur.

Weighing 8 lbs 10oz, 20.5 inches long. He has dark blue eyes, dark brown hair and he was born in parking stall 74 at about 7:20 AM on Thursday 25 September 2008.

Well, here's the story (I'm sure more details will come out over the days along with more pictures but wanted to get the story down now!).

I woke up with my first contraction around 3:00 AM. I waited to wake Brian up until about 3:30. After the false labour last week, I was making sure it was "real". They were about 10 minutes apart. We got up and came out to the living room to relax and hang out. After an hour, they were about 6 minutes apart. I had back labour again and so I thought that the baby was still posterior and therefore, like Anne, would take hours to arrive. (When I went to the hospital with Anne, I was every 4 minutes but only 4 cms so I figured I had a TON of time....) So then we called my mum in Abbotsford (an hour away) and my sister and her husband. We were pretty chill - too chill evidently - and told them "no rush, take a shower, come on over". I decided to lay in the tub for a while. I was certainly not enjoying my contractions or labour but really, it was so manageable that I figured I was just easing into it. After a half hour in the tub, Brian noted that I had thrown up once, was shaking and had become a bit more "inward" even telling him to "stop talking" right in the middle of a contraction. So he called my Mum and said that he thought I was in transition already. I looked at him like he had 10 heads - transition? I know transition, pal, and this ain't it. Besides, my water hadn't broken.

After I got out of the tub, the contractions went from 6-7 minutes to 3 minutes. That's when I realised that this wasn't a joke and we weren't taking our time. We called my sister again to hurry UP and get over here to keep an eye on Anne. We abandoned our plan to go to Burnaby Gen and instead decided to try to make it to Royal Columbian (which is just a few blocks away but my doctor was at Burnaby). Anne woke up right at the peak of my labour and she was totally relaxed. I am not a screamer but I certainly was moaning away but she was just like "Whatever, I want some Cheerios, call me when it's over." Brian set her up with a video and some breakfast and I laboured for a bit in the bedroom. I even posted a note on Facebook saying we had to run to the hospital.

About 7 AM, I went into the washroom and bent over. My water absolutely exploded with a pop and a huge gush. Then I felt the baby's head drop and I looked at Brian and said "We aren't going to make it!" My sister finally arrived (Adam stopped for Starbucks!!!) and ordered us out the door to Royal Columbian while she ran to her car and to call my Mum who was lost and stuck in traffic to change plans. With Anne, my water broke and it was still 5 hours until she came so Brian still thought we had time. I had four contractions on our way down the hall and in the elevator. We emerged from the elevator on our parkade (P2, if you're interested) and I had a massive contraction and the baby almost fell out. Brian half-carried, half-dragged me to the car, now desperate for help. He leaned me up against a pole and ran to the the truck to pull it over.

I had another two contractions and was actively working to NOT push the baby out but it was coming! The morning rush was on and people were coming into the parkade like crazy while I clung to this pole and hollered that I was NOT MOVING BECAUSE THIS BABY WAS GOING TO FALL OUT! A lady ran over and asked Brian if he needed help to which he replied "DESPERATELY!" and she said "Well, I'm a nurse."

Oh, thank you JESUS!

A bunch of other people were wanting to help (and have now seen my bare ass push out a baby in stall 74!). They called 911 and the fire department. Two more went up to our condo to tell whoever was left to bring towels down. Adam was there with Anne so he called my sister who was already AT the hospital and said "Change of plans! She's in the parkade and I think she's had the baby!" My sister called my Mum and they raced back to our place, not knowing if I was okay.

Kelly, our guardian angel, pulled my panties off (thankfully, I was wearing a skirt) and checked and then looked at Brian and said "Um, you aren't going to make it. I'll try to catch if you hold her up."

We leaned against the truck in the back door. I had a hand on the doorjamb and the other on the door, one foot up on the running boards. Brian crawled into the back seat and held me up under my arms. I gave one push and yell and the baby's head came out. He started crying right away. One more push and his shoulders were out. Kelly (the nurse) held his head and I reached down, grabbed his body under his arms (he was anterior by the way! Thanks for the prayers...) and pulled him up to my chest. Brian pulled me up onto the seat of the truck and off my feet and we all just broke down. I couldn't stop laughing, Brian couldn't stop crying and Kelly was trying to tell me to wait to nurse him (without thinking, I had started to pull my top off to try to get him to latch on!) until the paramedics got there. He was enormous, healthy, shrieking, bright pink and quite obviously our BOY! Kelly was rooting around the truck for a blanket or something to keep him warm but all we could find were Brian's paint cloths, so we wrapped him up in that.

We figure it was about 7:15 or 7:20 when he arrived, give or take a few minutes. Adam came down with Anne and some towels. We wrapped him up, Anne crawled in to the front seat and we just waited for the brigade to arrive.

The paramedics arrived about 5 minutes later. I felt great by that time if you can believe it. I was so high and excited, full of adrenalin. I felt FABULOUS! They were great, even letting Brian cut the cord and telling him out to get all of the blood out of the seats (hydrogen peroxide, if you're ever in a fix). My sister and mum finally arrived and came rushing in. They were pretty quickly reassured by my chirping from the gurney with the baby wrapped up that I was GREAT and IT'S A BOY. The paramedics thought it was hilarious and the firemen were pretty excited about the baby.

They rushed me and the baby to the hospital. I did tear a bit since he arrived so big and so fast so got some stitches. Brian arrived shortly after. We were put into a quiet wing in a private room and pretty much left alone for the day. Everyone we called was like "WHAT? You delivered in the parking lot???" The nurses kept coming in, disbelieving. He was so strong and healthy.

And to be honest, I felt great. It was the best experience! Even with the dirty concrete floor and the crowd, it was great. So much easier than my labour with Anne, even if it was faster. Let's just say my new theory on childbirth is "Make Gravity Work for You." The labour pains were not unmanageable at all; if anything, that's what made it happen - I was convinced it was going to "get so much worse" that when it didn't, I didn't realise this was as bad as it got so didn't move quick enough. And what's more - I wasn't afraid. It felt so normal and natural that I didn't feel panicked or freaked out. Brian was so calm throughout, that I just didn't panic. He told me later he was almost losing his mind in the parkade but he managed to keep it together because I sure didn't know that. Just no fear and I think that helped.

So we stayed at the hospital overnight and now we're home again. He's big and healthy, great nurser already.

And here's Joseph, back at the scene of his birth:

Thanks to everyone for your prayers! I'll post more and return your (hundreds of!) messages/emails soon. More pictures to come as well. Just wanted to get this up so you can stop wondering and worrying.