In which I donate books....lots of books

After nearly 8 years of marriage, we have amassed somewhere between 1500 and 2000 books. And that's with me being very active at our local library and usually only buying books I luuuuuurve and Brian also having worn out his library card and only buying books that are ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY, HONEY, I PROMISE.

But living in 850 sq feet with two adults, a toddler and a baby means that you quickly learn how to make room in odd places...

Yes, those are my books on top of kitchen cabinets. (and a filing cabinet on my fridge and some rather ripe bananas...that's another post...).

And this is an alcove in our foyer that Brian decided would make an excellent bookcase for him so he put shelves into it.

And then we just put bookshelves everywhere we can stick them.

This is just a small sample of the madness. Usually there are also piles of books in the corners, under the beds, beside the bed, on the floor, in the kids room....you get the picture.

(I am actually very proud of how few books we have in our house! This is quite the accomplishment. You should have seen us - or helped move us - three years ago....)

And you also learn which books you love and which books you like and which books you are embarrassed to have on your bookshelf (yes, I'm looking at you, "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People"...)

We have purged our books no less than 6 times apiece. And we still somehow have full bookshelves.After our last move, we did another purge which resulted in just 2 boxes in storage, a house filled with books and then another two bookcases in my parents basement (my poor parents...).

This week, I did another purge and lugged 178 books to the Salvation Army for donation. About half of them were Christian fiction books, another quarter were general market fiction that didn't live up to the hype or I never read again and another quarter were old books that I'd rescued from libraries because I loved old romances from the 30s like Kathleen Norris. But since it had been a good 15 years since I'd read Kathleen Norris, out she went.

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Of particular note is the fact that I have gotten rid of every single Brock and Bodie Thoene book in my house. They alone encompassed about 60 books. For those unfamiliar, the Thoenes are an evangelical husband and wife writing team that wrote particularly about WW2 and the struggle to establish the nation of Israel. I got turned on to them in high school and amassed the complete collection.

Since then, a lot of political views have changed but I still liked the story and the writing. I read them over every few years, right through the series chronologically. But the last two times, it was less than satisfying as the propaganda nature ad overly simplistic, onesided view was starting to grate on me. I knew I probably wouldn't read them again after that but I hung onto them nonetheless.

Then this election cycle started. And suddenly I started to get emails from the Thoenes that usually started with the sentence "The deceiver, Barack Hussein Obama...." and end with clarion calls for McCain-Palin. The worst rumours, innuendos and false accusasions of the campaign somehow made their way into my inbox when I'd signed up for the publishers email list.

This is not what I signed up for.

After 19 fear mongering emails too many, I not only unsubscribed from their publishers email list but decided to get rid of all of their books to boot.

My tastes - in books and politics - have changed.

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It's plain to see where our interests lie now and that's how a bookshelf should be. Literature, fiction, poetry, Biblical studies, theology, church matters, emergent, missional, biography of greats, memoirs and so on...And nary a self-help tome in the bunch!

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And yes, my bookshelves are alphabetically organised by author last name. *sigh* I just can't help myself....

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I have also signed on as a book reviewer for Thomas Nelson Publishers so book reviews will be more common....stay tuned for those!

In which these are a few priorities for the faithful

My Personal 'Faith Priorities' for this Election

by Jim Wallis

In 2004, several conservative Catholic bishops and a few megachurch pastors like Rick Warren issued their list of "non-negotiables," which were intended to be a voter guide for their followers. All of them were relatively the same list of issues: abortion, gay marriage, stem cell research, etc. None of them even included the word "poverty," only one example of the missing issues which are found quite clearly in the Bible. All of them were also relatively the same as official Republican Party Web sites of "non-negotiables." The political connections and commitments of the religious non-negotiable writers were quite clear.

I want to suggest a different approach this year and share my personal list of "faith priorities" that will guide me in making the imperfect choices that always confront us in any election year — and suggest that each of you come up with your own list of "faith" or "moral" priorities for this election year and take them into the voting booth with you.

After the last election, I wrote a book titled God’s Politics. I was criticized by some for presuming to speak for God, but that wasn’t the point. I was trying to explore what issues might be closest to the heart of God and how they may be quite different from what many strident religious voices were then saying. I was also saying that "God’s Politics" will often turn our partisan politics upside down, transcend our ideological categories of Left and Right, and challenge the core values and priorities of our political culture. I was also trying to say that there is certainly no easy jump from God’s politics to either the Republicans or Democrats. God is neither. In any election we face imperfect choices, but our choices should reflect the things we believe God cares about if we are people of faith, and our own moral sensibilities if we are not people of faith. Therefore, people of faith, and all of us, should be "values voters" but vote all our values, not just a few that can be easily manipulated for the benefit of one party or another.

In 2008, the kingdom of God is not on the ballot in any of the 50 states as far as I can see. So we can’t vote for that this year. But there are important choices in this year’s election — very important choices — which will dramatically impact what many in the religious community and outside of it call "the common good," and the outcome could be very important, perhaps even more so than in many recent electoral contests.

I am in no position to tell anyone what is "non-negotiable," and neither is any bishop or megachurch pastor, but let me tell you the "faith priorities" and values I will be voting on this year:

1. With more than 2,000 verses in the Bible about how we treat the poor and oppressed, I will examine the record, plans, policies, and promises made by the candidates on what they will do to overcome the scandal of extreme global poverty and the shame of such unnecessary domestic poverty in the richest nation in the world. Such a central theme of the Bible simply cannot be ignored at election time, as too many Christians have done for years. And any solution to the economic crisis that simply bails out the rich, and even the middle class, but ignores those at the bottom should simply be unacceptable to people of faith.
   
   
   
2. From the biblical prophets to Jesus, there is, at least, a biblical presumption against war and the hope of beating our swords into instruments of peace. So I will choose the candidates who will be least likely to lead us into more disastrous wars and find better ways to resolve the inevitable conflicts in the world and make us all safer. I will choose the candidates who seem to best understand that our security depends upon other people’s security (everyone having "their own vine and fig tree, so no one can make them afraid," as the prophets say) more than upon how high we can build walls or a stockpile of weapons. Christians should never expect a pacifist president, but we can insist on one who views military force only as a very last resort, when all other diplomatic and economic measures have failed, and never as a preferred or habitual response to conflict.
   
   
   
3. "Choosing life" is a constant biblical theme, so I will choose candidates who have the most consistent ethic of life, addressing all the threats to human life and dignity that we face — not just one. Thirty-thousand children dying globally each day of preventable hunger and disease is a life issue. The genocide in Darfur is a life issue. Health care is a life issue. War is a life issue. The death penalty is a life issue. And on abortion, I will choose candidates who have the best chance to pursue the practical and proven policies which could dramatically reduce the number of abortions in America and therefore save precious unborn lives, rather than those who simply repeat the polarized legal debates and "pro-choice" and "pro-life" mantras from either side.
   
   
   
4. God’s fragile creation is clearly under assault, and I will choose the candidates who will likely be most faithful in our care of the environment. In particular, I will choose the candidates who will most clearly take on the growing threat of climate change, and who have the strongest commitment to the conversion of our economy and way of life to a cleaner, safer, and more renewable energy future. And that choice could accomplish other key moral priorities like the redemption of a dangerous foreign policy built on Middle East oil dependence, and the great prospects of job creation and economic renewal from a new "green" economy built on more spiritual values of conservation, stewardship, sustainability, respect, responsibility, co-dependence, modesty, and even humility.
   
   
   
5. Every human being is made in the image of God, so I will choose the candidates who are most likely to protect human rights and human dignity. Sexual and economic slavery is on the rise around the world, and an end to human trafficking must become a top priority. As many religious leaders have now said, torture is completely morally unacceptable, under any circumstances, and I will choose the candidates who are most committed to reversing American policy on the treatment of prisoners. And I will choose the candidates who understand that the immigration system is totally broken and needs comprehensive reform, but must be changed in ways that are compassionate, fair, just, and consistent with the biblical command to "welcome the stranger."
   
   
   
6. Healthy families are the foundation of our community life, and nothing is more important than how we are raising up the next generation. As the father of two young boys, I am deeply concerned about the values our leaders model in the midst of the cultural degeneracy assaulting our children. Which candidates will best exemplify and articulate strong family values, using the White House and other offices as bully pulpits to speak of sexual restraint and integrity, marital fidelity, strong parenting, and putting family values over economic values? And I will choose the candidates who promise to really deal with the enormous economic and cultural pressures that have made parenting such a "countercultural activity" in America today, rather than those who merely scapegoat gay people for the serious problems of heterosexual family breakdown.

That is my list of personal "faith priorities" for the election year of 2008, but they are not "non-negotiables" for anyone else. It’s time for each of us to make up our own list in these next 12 days. Make your list and send this on to your friends and family members, inviting them to do the same thing.

In which I wonder if you can be emergent in a conservative denomination?

As most of you know, we are nearing the end of "right now" and are on the cusp of "what's next". We have been in this place of transition between what came before and what is coming next as Brian has taken a few years off from pastoral ministry to focus on his seminary training in his graduate work and we've also birthed some babies, resulting in him rediscovering his gifts for carpentry and home restoration as a vocation.  Now he's nearing the end of school (probably will be done this summer!) and so our heads and hearts are full of wonder and prayer and plans and dreams.
When we left Texas and fulltime ministry, we planned that, at the conclusion of Brian's seminary work at Regent, we would start a church.
Ah, idealism....if only it were that easy...
The issue that we've run into - over and over again - is that we long to start a church in community and with oversight. We don't want to be "lone-rangers" any longer. We have been independents for most of our lives and that has had its benefits. But as a result of that, we have also seen a lot of abuses that warn us off of that route for ourselves. This is an entire (depressing) post on its own so I won't delve there right now...
We started conversations with a few denominations months ago. One in particular - the Christian and Missionary Alliance - has become what we think could be a home for us. Theologically, we're pretty lined up. There are a few concerns that I have as it is a very conservative denomination (when I say "conservative" I don't mean politically, just for the record, more theologically) so I have issues with their stances on women and their evangelical overemphasis on issues like gay marriage as well as other points.
Plus, I just kind of like not having a denominational fence around me. I really like my "lone-ranger" spirituality even though I think churches need oversight. Is that hypocritical??
Over the years, I've self-identified myself as more of an emergent and Brian has self-identified as missional. We like to think we can blend those things pretty well.
We have identified a few things that are important to us as we either start a new church or begin to pastor an existing church:
1.  The Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Above all else, it is all about this. Following in The Way. Not about a way of theology or humanity or politics or power or anything else - just this simple thing.
2.  Community. Connection in an age of disconnect.  A church that feels more like family than a conference centre or a seminar. True, messy relationships, together on a journey, relevant in the context to which you are called.
3.  Discipleship or "following Jesus". One of the truest-truths (*nod to Stephen Colbert*) is that we can be transformed - we don't have to die the same people we are today. We can live the life that was imagined for us and by us.  We see this as connected to the Church as a whole, involving spiritual and ancient practices such as worship, prayer, service, silence etc. Basically, working out what the work of God has already worked "in". It's a wholeness of values - from how you are with your home and your family and your kids to how you are in the world around you. Are you Jesus with skin on? If you are following him, do you resemble him?
4. Mission. Not "evangelism" *shudder*.  But hospitality, a ministry of presence, openness to the people around you and so on.
But I wondered - was there space for us anywhere? Was there room for people like us in a denomination? After all, we have widened our borders and deepened our foundations rather significantly over the years. Sometimes I have felt like there isn't room for us anymore in our tradition so why would there be room for us in a more conservative group?
So, imagine my surprise when a blog that I have read occasionally called Reclaiming the Mission had this post. Turns out the guy that writes it is C&MA as well - and has planted a church that looks remarkably like what we envision. And he wrote this article for Fuller Theological on the value of planting emerging/missional churches within denominations like C&MA!
The entire article is this guy's take on what it was like to plant this same type of church within the C&MA.
Isn't it funny when God calls our bluff?
So this is making me feel a bit better about this whole thing. After all, we aren't the first. We won't be the last.
Maybe there is room for us in an established house after all? Maybe we can be us and yet still belong to a family?
What has your experience been in a denomination or otherwise? Any insights for us?

In which we go to the Patch of Pumpkins

I've always wanted to go to a pumpkin patch and an apple orchard. I am a city kid but I was raised with a deep appreciation of the land and outdoors (as only befits a prairie kid, just one generation away from farming in the land of living sky). So I've always wanted to have fruit trees (and a deep freeze, but that's another post...) and introduce our kids to how we get our food.

Brian and I took the tinies to Applebarn in Abbotsford. My sister and her husband met us there for the morning. Talk about a great place for kids! I want to have Anne's birthday party there next year. They had a big "jumping pillow", petting barn with bunnies, goats and sheep, a playground, a hay ride, pumpkins, apples and all kinds of interesting things. One of our favourites was this elaborate goat bridge over the barn for "Billy Goat Gruff" that even had a "troll" underneath it.

Of course, my deep connection to nature notwithstanding, one of the owners there had to poke a bit of fun at this citified girl. We were in the pumpkin patch and it was very muddy. I had on my runners instead of rubbers. I picked my way across the field in the grass while the two farmers watched with an amused expression.

"Guess you'll stick to the grass?" one mentioned with a grin.

"I sure will," I grinned back. "You told me that the grass is the best place if you want to avoid getting muddy. And I'm just smart enough to do what I'm told."

"Well, I guess you're not that smart," he remarked. "You're wearing white runners."

I couldn't help but laugh.

Anne had a great time, especially with all of the animals. Joseph had a full tummy and so just slept in the snugly the entire time. He's such an easy kid.

Here are a few pictures:

Next year, Joseph will be old enough to be in more of the pictures! He was too busy snoring in the Snugly to bother sitting on a pumpkin.

In which I prove that I am still a 14-year-old at heart

Today in church, Brian was holding Joseph and I was beside them (Anne was, of course, playing with her beloved "church kids" downstairs in the toddler room).

Suddenly Joseph starts to poop. Loudly. Melodiously. Obviously successfully.

Everyone else around us smiles discreety at the symphony going on around us.

Everyone but me.

I start to laugh. I can't stop laughing.

The pew starts shaking. The more I try to stop, the harder I keep laughing.

Brian gives me THE EYE. THE EYE says "Are you kidding me? Get it together, woman!"

I can't stop laughing. Joseph can't stop pooping. I'm wiping tears from my eyes by the time he's finished.

Brian leans over to me and says "My junior highers in Texas could have handled that better than you just did!"

What can I say? At what age does farting stop being funny???

In which we make recommendations for new mums

At most of the Baby Showers I've been to lately, there has been a cool idea that I thought we could try here. Basically, the guests (even those that don't have kids) go around the room and offer their best piece of parenting advice to the new mum-to-be. It's hilarious and very insightful and sometimes contradictory. I always love it and learn something.

So contribute yours in the comments section! These are mine:

Disclaimer:  I don't claim to have figured out parenting. After all, my two-year-old is currently back in diapers. So trust me, I'm well aware of my shortcomings as a parent. But I thought I'd share my top five recommendations for new parents. After all, I've got a three week old right now (already!) and I had a great newborn experience with my first as well.

1.  Breastfeeding. I know you're not likely surprised by this recommendation. But seriously. There are 101 good reasons to breastfeed. Personally, I have never expressed a bottle before and have exclusively just fed my kids from the breast. But that's just me and it's also because I don't have to go back to work until he's a year old at which time, with Anne, I was just nursing in the morning and at bedtime. For the baby, for you...nutritionally, medically, emotionally and, yes, spiritually, I feel it's one of the best gifts to give your kids...and you! It's simple, easy and, personally, I find I have enough milk for a Russian orphanage by about Day 6. This was probably the MOST favourite part of parenting for me, especially in those early months. I felt confident and secure, bonded and strong as a result of this. It mattered to me and it made a huge difference for my kids. (Anne has never even had an ear infection!)

2.  Co-sleeping or, as we call our enormous king size bed, The Family Bed. I cannot imagine getting up every hour or two to trudge down the hall to feed or comfort. Personally, I keep my kids in bed with us until they are about 4 months old. Then we start to transition them to their own bed. I like it for several reasons. First of all, I get more sleep!!! If they are hungry, I just roll over and they latch on and nurse while I sleep. And the other benefit is that they sleep more. I found with Anne that it taught her what is day and what is night. She was more prone to fall asleep and STAY asleep because we were right there, she was warm, she was fed etc. Same thing with Joseph. Once we transitioned her to her bed, she slept wonderfully there as well. Even now, she sleeps 12 hours a night and has a 2-3 hour nap a day. She loves her quiet, sleep time. She was even sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and I firmly think it was just because we were sleeping with her. Finally, it helped my husband bond more with the kids. He couldn't get up and nurse them but he loved to snuggle in bed, hold their warm bodies close and generally have that closeness between them during sleep. It made him feel more connected to them especially after a long day away from the family. There are some families that do it for years but I prefer our own bed after about 4-5 months.

3.  The 4th trimester concept. I read this in a book called "The Happiest Baby on the Block." I didn't get a whole lot out of the book as it's more for parents with colick-y babies which I didn't have. But this concept really stuck with me. Basically, treat your babies like they were born three months too early. Think of it from their perspective - they've gone from being held constantly, warm constantly, fed constantly to this life on the outside. Even if you fed them or held them 8 hours a day, to them it feels like a downgrade!  So don't worry about schedules, sleeping patterns and routines, particularly related to nursing. Just hold, wear them (another big favourite of mine), nurse on demand, sleep with them etc. After three months, you'll be well bonded, they'll be fat and happy and ready for life on the outside. I practiced this with Annie....after three months, she slipped into a happy routine and was on her way. And life was pretty easy in our house. Not too many crying babies for those first three months because they were fed, carried and held. Not too many crying babies afterwards either because by then they were fat, happy and SECURE in our love. My kids don't walk all over us and we are certainly a "routine" kind of family (I can't help myself....I love it too much.) but for those first three months, toss it out and just enjoy.

4.  Pick them up! This goes back to the 4th Trimester thing. I love "baby wearing." Anne practically lived in our sling and Snugly. I did everything with her in there - vacuuming, grocery shopping, walking etc. Kids don't cry when they're being held and this saves your arms...or keeps them free for cooking or snugly two year olds. Even now, Anne likes to get in the sling with Brian and have him read her stories when she's not feeling well. If they howl when they're put down or alone, then just pick them up. I also never bar family from holding the babies. Sometimes my sister or mum or Auntie or someone would say "Oh, should I put her/him down? Am I spoiling them?" I don't think you can spoil a baby in the first few months. If they want to hold them and rock, then for pity's sake, rock away. I'd rather Joseph and Anne have too much love than not enough.

5.  The Holy Spirit. You can read all of the books in the world, talk to all of the parents in the world, have all the support in the world but at the end of the day, it's you, your spouse and your kids. And I don't know about you guys, but I ran out of myself pretty darn quick. I need God's wisdom and insight. I need even the occasional miracle. I need his strength, power, wisdom and even unconditional love. I need that peace and patience operating in my life. Without my lifeline to the spirit of God, I don't know how to parent. I don't know how to love so completely, overwhelmingly and effectively. But whenever I'm at the end of my rope, i feel the voice of God speak to me and give me wisdom for my kids. And inevitably, when I screw up as I often do, there is always grace there for me...and for my tinies.

What about you? What are your best-kept secrets that you would tell new mums if you could??

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In which even the Cabbage Patch doll didn't emerge unscathed

So I turned my back for about 5 MINUTES this morning.

And in that 5 MINUTES, Anne gave her dolly a bath in Vaseline.

Vaseline.

Oh, and herself. If you think the doll looks gruesome, you should have seen my 2-year-old.

We had ourselves a TIME here this morning.

So in the spirit of "Not Me Mondays" (even though it's Tuesday?!), started by MckMama, I'd like you to know what did NOT happen this morning....

• My son did NOT have an enormous, noisy blow-out of a poop at the library right during story time.
  
• My daughter did NOT take off her pants and her panties in the washroom at the library and then proceed to pee STANDING UP because she wanted to "pee like Daddy." Nope. Because that would imply that I had my back to her while trying to change Joseph's blow-out diaper and didn't catch her in time.
  
• And then I did NOT check her jeans, see that there were only 3-4 spots of pee on them and decide that that was okay and then put them back on her for storytime. Nope. Not me.
  
• I did NOT leave behind my breast pads on the floor at the library after nursing Joseph because I simply forgot them. Nor did a nice Filipino nanny come up to me and say, haltingly, "Are those your Boob Pads?" while pointing at them on the floor. Not me.
  
• My daughter did NOT go on a hugging frenzy at the library, trying to hug every  kid in sight. Neither did she go up to every kid before hand and say "Hi, Kid!" a la Krusty the Clown before trying to hug them. Nope, not my kid.
  
• I did NOT put my daughter in time-outs THREE TIMES this morning for disobedience. Nope. She's perfect and so am I.
  
• I did NOT catch my daughter in Joseph's bassinette with him this morning.

• I did NOT make an entire batch of homemade chicken noodle soup for lunch only to eat half a chocolate bar and an apple instead.
  
• Because my son did not have a complete meltdown over being made to wait for five minutes for his lunch while my daughter, who was playing in the sink while I cooked, then had her own Sympathy Meltdown, ordering me to FEED BABY! And when I didn't listen to her, then splashed me with the soapy water. Resulting in Time Out #2 out of 3. Not in this house.
  
• So there is NOT still a half-cooked batch of chicken noodle soup on my stove, waiting to be finished. An hour later.
  
• I do NOT have a broken washing machine - A WASHING MACHINE! WITH TWO TINIES! ONE OF WHOM IS JUST 3 WEEKS OLD AND ONE THAT IS - SUPPOSEDLY - POTTY TRAINING - nor do I have a broken garburator. Not us.
  
• I have NOT stopped returning phone calls and emails because I'm just too tired. Nope, not me.
  
• I am NOT sitting here blogging when I should be cleaning up the kitchen or bathroom. Or calling a repairman AGAIN.
  
• I did NOT eventually put on an Elmo DVD for Anne on the computer, just to get some peace for at least 20 minutes. Nope. Not this TV abandoner.
  
• I did NOT fervently wish for a drive-thru Starbucks this morning because I really wanted a coffee. Really. Wanted. A. Coffee. But not badly enough to try to get the two tinies out of the vehicle and into the coffee shop. And then I did not curse Vancouver and it's stupid environmentalism that resulted in no drive-thrus for me. Because whoever invented drive-thru had SMALL CHILDREN TOO.

And that's just a small morning sample of what is NOT going on at our house....

This morning, the tinies won this round. I will conquer in the end. But right now, they're finally both still sleeping. So I'll live to fight another day.....after naptime.

In which it is Thanksgiving and Monday already *faint*

The weekend that was: We spent Friday to Sunday in Abbotsford with my parents for Thanksgiving. Just the six of us as my sister and her husband (and my expected niece/nephew) are in Maui for their anniversary/before-we-have-kids trip. We had a lovely weekend even though the Flames got spanked not once but twice this week by the Canucks. And then I took the tinies to church while Brian slogged away at schoolwork.
Where I am at the moment:  Writing in the corner of my couch while Joseph sleeps beside me. It's pouring rain, Brian was called out to work at a flood, Anne is napping and I have a cuppa tea. Wonders! 
On my to-do list this week: Take Joseph to the doctor for his "one week appointment" (he's almost 18 days old now...oops). Also get Anne's 2-year-appointment (she's almost 26 months....again, oops) out of the way. I also plan going to a Mummy Group at my church. I was planning on taking the kids to my work as well but it seems everyone is busy (working...how about that?) so that might have to wait until next week. Also, generally working to maintain my sanity while adjusting to the two tinies.
Procrastinating about:  Dealing with Anne's potty training issues. She's regressed big time since Joseph's arrival and I'm ashamed to admit that I've just put on her pull-ups and, Scarlett O'hara style, just decided to worry about it tomorrow.
Book I’m in the midst of: Zora and Nicky by Claudia Mair Burney. I usually don't read a lot of Christian fiction (because, to be honest, it's terrible). But I do love Lisa Samson and she's a fan of this author. I am only about 50 pages in and I am LOVING it even though its uncomfortable. The tough thing is finding time to read it...*sigh*
Interesting photos that I took this week: I call this look of Joseph's his "Dr. Evil Look"....as in, "I'd like ....one...MILLION....dollars!" (shout-out to the Austin fans...)

Music that seemed to catch my attention this past week: Actually, just an old chorus that we sang on Sunday morning. "Give thanks with a grateful heart....give thanks to the Holy One...give thanks because he's given Jesus Christ his son....and now let the weak say I am strong, let the poor say I am rich because of what the Lord has done for me....give thanks." We used to sing it when I was a kid in church and I've always loved it. Seemed very fitting for Thanksgiving and it's been in my mouth ever since.
How I’m feeling about this week: A little overwhelmed but optimistic.

In which it's time for a photo update

My two little helpers...Annie is helping me "cook" here while Joseph look on.

Brian and Anne and Joseph reading the newspaper.

He's smiling already! Not even 2 weeks old...and don't tell me it's gas....

Me and my little man.

In which we have a conversation about wind and trees

Today was a windy day. Anne was standing at our window, watching the trees move. The sunlight was streaming into the house, making shadows on our carpet of the trees dancing outside. She kept moving her gaze from the trees outside to the tree-shadows inside.

"Mumma, what's that?"

"It's wind, sweetheart. The wind is moving the trees. And the sun is making a shadow with the trees. See? This is a shadow just like outside. And the wind is making the trees dance."

She sat in thoughtful silence.

"Mumma, I wanna be in wind. I wanna dance in trees."

"Sounds lovely, my dear. Just lovely."

In which cleaning and scrubbing can wait

This afternoon and evening, I was going to be productive.

You know those kind of days....you've got eight times more on your "to-do" list than you could possibly accomplish even if you didn't have two tinies, one of whom is potty training and the other, just 11 days old. But, full of good intentions and a little self-delusion, you decide to embark on it anyway.

And your tiny children simply can't allow it.

I pulled out the vacuum. I poured water into my bucket to scrub my kitchen floor. I had my eye on the bookshelves, covered as they were in dust an inch thick. And a vague hope of maybe getting to the washroom before the night was over. And then there were the thank-you cards and the filing cabinet to organise and the laundry to fold., the dishwasher to empty, supper to cook..

"Game on," said my children to each other. "Game on."

The smallest tiny decided that now was as good a time as any for a nursing marathon. So he's been latched onto me, non-stop, for about 5 hours. He's refused to go to sleep even though he's exhausted (and so am I!). He doesn't want the sling. He doesn't want to be laid down. He won't tolerate being in the bassinette. No, Mumma. It's the boob or nothing. And he shrieked until it was so.

And the bigger tiny is pulling crackers out the cupboard because she thinks her Mummy is hungry. She's taking her clothes off because she wants to "dance naykid". She's making soap bubbles in the bathroom sink and then decorating the mirror with them because they are so "pwetty."  And then tripping over the toy piano in the middle of the floor and bursting into tears because of the "wowie" and begging for "tyonol" because of the "huwt".

The bargaining is on. One is finally settled and nursing happily. But the other one has a memory now and will remember if I choose the baby over her in her moment of need. So I put the baby down and we "doctor up" the "wowie" while the tiniest one makes known how unhappy he is with this arrangement.

Balance, balance. Tightrope, tightrope. Careful....steady now!

So now the tiniest one is settled in his bassinette, tummy full, happily filling his diaper and off in dreamland - FINALLY. I have a moment. What to do? Finish the chores or...

Two favourite stories, Goodnight Moon and Two Little Gardeners, were read out loud to Annie and her Pooh bear. She has been snuggled and kissed and Ozonoled and tucked in. I left her in the middle of her blankets and we blew kisses to each other all the way out of the door.

Now I've collapsed in the living room and surveyed the damage. Toys strewn everywhere. A kitchen that is messier than it was even beforehand. A half-vacuumed floor. A washed kitchen floor, somehow in the midst of the chaos because it was a fun chore for Anne to help out with. A splitting headache and a sore back. Nothing accomplished. If anything, more to do.

But I've picked up my son after singing my daughter to sleep and now we're rocking in our rocking chair, his head against my heartbeat. I've decided to worry about it tomorrow. Or the next day.

In my mother's bedroom was an embroidered picture that read:

"Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow

For babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow.

So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep

I'm rocking my baby for babies don't keep."

In which I am looking towards life in the Spirit

We really enjoyed church yesterday. Again, another miracle of miracles for this new family of four to make it to a 9:30 service!

But Anne was so excited to play with church kids and we were excited to be back with our community after having Joseph. All morning long, even people we didn't know were coming up to us and saying, "Is THIS the parkade baby?" 

Our pastor has been doing an excellent series on the fruit of the life in the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

But what happens when we live God's way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely. ~ Galatians 5:22-23

The great thing is how much he's emphasized that it's not us "trying harder" to be those things - it is truly the work of the Holy Spirit in us. I've already established that I am unable to practice these behaviours on my own...it is definitely a work of God! This is the part of faith that I find easy to embrace because I've discovered one thing as a parent very quickly: you come to the end of yourself pretty darn quick. And so it's natural for me to turn to Jesus, to rely on the Spirit for wisdom and discernment, to open my heart up to however God sees fit to develop these things in me.

Sometimes I have felt that God takes a season in my life to develop these characteristics. For instance, I have, for the past three years, learned a lot about patience in particular. Other seasons it was all about forgiveness - learning to forgive, learning to let things go, learning to release offenses. And self-control is just an ongoing battle! ROFL

I wish that people could use these words to describe Jesus-followers. Unfortunately, we rarely deserve them. Myself included.

It is always a journey, isn't it? A constant development and shifting towards what God actually intends, his dream for humanity, to not need to "force our way in life" but instead to live in a basic holiness that permeates the things and people around us.

In which the kids are dressed...sort of

I have singlehandedly bathed, fed and dressed two tinies this morning. And I even managed to have a shower myself and a cuppa tea.

*faint*

Granted, Anne is only wearing a ballerina dress but it's not jammies so it counts right??

(She's "doing the Snuffleupaguss" here....that's her "snuffle" up in the air....don't ask...)

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Anne was out on the balcony with Brian doing their gardening on Saturday night. She had helped me cook supper and then went outside with him to help put the tomatoes up. She was working away and then came in to have a potty. I had decided to make a batch of Oatmeal Raisin cookies and was just getting the ingredients out.

She stood in the doorway and put her hands up in the air, dumbfounded to find me able to bake without her.

"What's going on in here?" she asked accusingly.

Then she came running over to dump the ingredients in the bowl for me and sneak the chocolate chips and raisins out of the batter when she thought I wasn't looking.

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Her speech has really shifted. She understands jokes and teasing, speaks in full sentences, responds to everything and ...wait for it...has an opinion on most things. I know you're terribly surprised by that development given how her parents, you know, suffer from a deplorable lack of opinions.

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And here's the wee lad....I promise he doesn't sleep all the time. I just never grab the camera when he's awake!  Like his little nursing blister on his upper lip? LOL

Yes, I am reading Vanity Fair....

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In which I share bits and bobs and end with a bit about Joseph's bob

It's Saturday morning. Joseph and I are chilling on the couch after his bath. Is there anything that smells better than a just washed newborn? That milky breath, baby lotion and baby shampoo smells like heaven.

Anne and Brian just left for Home Depot. He's putting down our tomatoes and flowers today so they needed to get a couple items as well as get the oil changed on the truck. Anne loves to be a Helper and especially loves to go with Daddy to work. She has one pair of brown socks we call her "work socks" and she always wears them on Saturdays with her Dad. She also wants him to wear his work clothes - his company shirt, his work boots etc. if they are going to "work". She doesn't think you can work without the proper attire....girl after my own heart!

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Allow me a proud Mummy moment about my kids - they're spectacular. Seriously. Anne has been delightful since Joseph was born. No tantrums, no hitting, no wailing and jealousy. She loves to "play" with him and shares all of her toys. She hasn't even been bothered by his crying but just wants to help usually running over to me, lifting her top, pointing to her little chest and saying "BABY EAT!" like she's worried I'll forget. She's regressed a bit on the potty training but we'll get it back. And big picture, it's not the big of a deal. I love being home with her. She's actually great company and an interesting little conversationalist already.

She loves going to church especially. All week long, she asks "Can I play with church kids? Church kids? Please?"

And Joseph? He's a very easy baby. Anne was a dream baby too and so everyone would profess dire warnings about how "oh, well, wait til your second!" Not true. He's already got his days and nights figured out. He's up three times at night for nursing but his main awake times are in the morning and evenings. He's a very chilled out little guy as well, very content to just watch the show. He has also proven an uncanny ability to sleep through EVERYTHING. His nursing is phenomenal - latched so early and easily and now he positively goes to town. He's quite strong, trying to lift his head and look around already.

He's a happy guy as long as his tummy is full - but aren't we all??

---

And I'm feeling MUCH MUCH better. It amazes me how much easier this recovery has been. Even though I had Anne naturally as well, this delivery was so fast and straight forward that I already feel great. I mean, not 100% but definitely great. I am a big fan of my new method! Walk around a lot during labour and then stand up to push him out! I would recommend at least having a midwife and being in a clean house but meh. What can you do?

---

I even took the kids to the community centre yesterday for Motoring Munchkins so Anne could run her face off for two hours as it was raining outside. It's about a half a km walk there but I put Anne in the stroller and Joseph in the sling and away we went. She just LOVES to play with kids.

They also have this time called "Exercise" when they holler for all the kids to come over and they do things like touch your toes, jump out wide, jump together, run in place and so on. Most of the kids are about 3-4 but Anne is right in there with them. She follows all of the directions but it's funny because she is SO EXCITED to be there that she keeps turning around to look at me like CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW MUCH FUN THIS IS?!? She's practically levitating. I am definitely going to bring the video camera next time. Cracked me up.

Of course, it started to pour on my way home though. And Anne didn't want to put her shoes on. And then Joseph woke up to howl for his supper. That was the longest 15 minute walk of my life! LOL

---

The local newspaper has gotten wind of our crazy birth story and want to come over to do an interview for the paper. I haven't decided yet about it. I don't like to be in the paper but I'm sure it would be a fun keepsake for Joseph and even an opportunity to say "thanks" to Kelly-the-Nurse/Angel as well as the paramedics and firemen. So we'll see.

---

The people in our building are abuzz with the story too. We have a pretty quiet building and getting to know your neighbours can be hard. But since we had this baby it seems everyone in the building is talking about it and so they are all so eager to talk to us. Turns out all you need to do to get your neighbours to open up is have a baby in the parkade!  We've gotten flowers and notes and hugs galore. I eventually put up a flyer next to the mailbox that said "thanks to everyone for all of your help!" along with a picture of Joseph and assurances that we were fine and healthy.

We wrote a nice card to Kelly and got her a gift certificate for The Bay to buy a new blouse since I so soundly ruined the one she had on as well as a beautiful bouquet of sunflowers. I felt so stuck - how do you properly thank someone for catching your baby in the parkade? I don't think you can but I hope she knows how grateful we are.

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In other good news....

• I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Of course, with the post-partum belly still. And that number is nothing to brag about. But still. We're on our way.
  
• Managed to get my wedding rings on again as well. Usually they're rather loose and right now are rather tight. But they're on. No longer is anyone looking at me like I'm a cheerleader in trouble.
  
• I also did up my pre-preggo jeans yesterday. Woot! And then I caught a glimpse of the muffin-top and thought...maybe I should do my sit-ups first....?
  
• I have found that it cheers me up immensely to put on red lipstick while I clean the bathroom. Highly recommend.

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Finally, the verdict that you've all been waiting for....we're decided to NOT circumcise Joseph. It's just not done here and we feel comfortable with the reasons for leaving him intact. So there you go.

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In which I pray

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy.

 

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

 

Amen.

St. Francis of Assisi - 13th century

In which I would be just fine if I never heard the word "maverick" again

Maverick....Main Street...Maverick Team....Change...Washington Insiders...You betcha...ya know...small town values...

And of course, the droppin' of the "g"....bringin', changin', reignin'....

---

We watched two debates last night. First, the American vice presidential one and then I watched the Canadian leaders one during one of Joseph's late night feeds.

There are at least another two things that I think Americans would benefit from our system:

1. SHORT ELECTION CYCLES. Seriously. We called our election and it's happening in six weeks SIX WEEKS. These senators have all been absent from their roles for more than TWO YEARS. Stupid fixed election dates. Get back to work.
   
2. Round table format for debates. Rather than a moderator going one at a time, ours is more relaxed and conversational but also confrontational as the leaders actually spar with one another instead of respond one at a time to the same question. They directly challenged each other's answers and it seems more like a real debate/conversation than a side-by-side interview.

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American Debate Thoughts:

• I thought that Palin did pretty well for the first third or so. I'd even say she carried honours there. That cheeky "can I call you Joe?" was pretty cool and she was obviously well-rehearsed and prepared. Unlike her Katie Couric interviews and other candid moments, her verbs and nouns all agreed with one another so that's another point. She certainly enjoyed low expectations going in so as long as she didn't throw up or curse, she'd be considered to have held her own. But she did much better than that, particularly, as I said for the first bit. Then her folksy-cheekiness started to piss me off. You know what? You're running for VP, for pity's sake. Grow up. Cute doesn't work on the world stage.
  
• I disagree with the McCain-Palin ideas and plans etc. but you guys know that so I won't go into that much. Content-wise, I understand there were a lot of "fact-checkers" busy last night though - and not because the two candidates were so good at telling the truth. 
  
• By the mid-point of the debate though, it shifted to Biden. He was tremendous - strong, senatorial, gracious. I was very impressed with his handling of himself.
  
• There were two moments that to me summed up why I struggle with Sarah Palin and why she actually kind of frightens me (by that, I mean, the thought of her in charge of the United States if anything were to happen to McCain....which is pretty likely...after all, he's super-OLD). First of all, she never answered the questions. She was evasive and contradictory usually going back to her talking points even if they weren't relevant. She wanted to frame the debate a certain way and even admitted at one point to "not answering the questions" because she wanted to "talk directly to the American people". I do believe that answering the question would have afforded her the same privilege of talking directly to the American people but whatever. This showed me that she had memorized certain things and only could talk about these specific phrases and "zingers". The second moment was when Joe Biden spoke meaningfully and tearfully about his own struggles as a parent after the loss of his wife and baby daughter. He roundly schooled Palin on the notion that mothers - and "small town folks" - somehow have the market cornered on a deep and abiding love for their children. It was very moving. I anticipated that she would at least say something along the lines of "you're right - fathers are indispensable for the family" or something but she just coolly jumped right into "we're mavericks' for the 84,000th time. It showed a deep lack of compassion and ability to listen to me. Or maybe she just can't think on her feet? Could only recite?
  
• I found it interesting that everyone was saying Biden had to be careful not to come across too "hard" or harsh with Palin. I wonder if anyone would have those concerns if it was Hillary Clinton up there. Have we just accepted that Palin is a bit weaker and somehow, because she's a woman, prone to burst into tears? I highly doubt Hillary would have engendered the same concern.
  
• Overall, Biden won, hands down. But Palin didn't embarrass herself either. So we move forward.

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The Canadian Debate

• I thought that Stephen Harper likely won the debate. I'm sure it killed him to not zing everyone around the table but he stayed calm and "prime ministerial".
  
• I hear that Dion just spanked him at the French debate (didn't watch that one). But he seems like such a poor leader - shrill, panicky, Chicken-Little-ish to me.
  
• Best line of the night? Gilles Duceppe informing the other leaders "none of us are going to win and we all know it." BWAHAHAHAHA.
  
• Overall, it was interesting to me that the Canadian people seemed so absent from this debate. It was all about how evil Harper is. These other four leaders keep banking on his unlikability to elect them. It was definitely dog-pile on Harper but he held his own. The issues weren't really focused on us but more on them.
  
• Well, hallelujah - Harper FINALLY admitted that he was wrong to try to push Canada into Iraq. Thank God we didn't join the coalition there. Right now, we're busy saving the world in Afghanistan still. And likely will continue to go it alone while the US remains mired in Iraq and NATO remains unwilling to touch any US-lead plan.
  
• I wasn't impressed with any of them. Not. One.
  
• Here's the thing: I've voted Conservative almost my entire life. But this year I am ripe for the picking because of Stephen Harper and the tone of the Conservatives lately. Even though I agree on most (certainly not all) of their points, I've found their style too American and negative. So I was pretty ready to abandon ship this election if there was at least a halfway alternative. And there simply isn't. Not one of those leaders impressed me to vote them in for Class Secretary let alone Prime Minister.
  
• So I'll likely vote for the Conservatives. Despite my dislike of Stephen Harper (that whole fixed election date thing I didn't agree with but then to break the promise? Not cool.), I simply can't stomach any of the others. So now what? It's best of the worst, I guess.

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Only one more sleep until Tina Fey does her take on it! Yippeee!

In which I am pretty tired but it's pretty worth it

Remember how when you had your first baby, everyone told you "Now make sure you sleep when the baby sleeps?"

Yeah.

You don't get to do that when you have a 2 year old that's awake and demanding the Hokey Pokey.

Joseph hit a bit of a growth spurt last night. He nursed on and off for almost 7 hours. I am pretty tired today. He'd nurse, lay down for ten minutes and then be up again, rooting around and bawling for breakfast. He didn't hardly sleep all night and so, neither did I. He finallly crashed at about 6:45 and at 6:52, I heard Anne calling "Mumma...I had a poo!"

Yesterday was my first day with the two of them. I managed pretty well until Joseph decided he didn't need to sleep all night.

My parents had Anne for a sleepover on Tuesday night. I am hard-pressed to figure out who enjoys it more - them or Anne. She was full of tales when she got home about she had "cream" (ice cream) and "watched gockey" (watched hockey) with Papa, had a 'baff in the tub" and so on. My folks and sister hung out until 3 and then Anne was up at 3:30. We horsed around and played for an hour together with all of her toys. Then Joseph was up and at'em. We gave him a bath together. Then got supper for Anne. Finished the last of the laundry. Then, because after a supper of pancakes (!), Anne looked like she'd taken a bath in syrup, we gave her a bath as well. She had regressed the past few days on potty training since Joseph arrived but yesterday she did wonderfully so that was busy as well. Brian was running late from work and so wasn't home until about 6:30. But we three managed pretty well. As soon as Anne went to bed at 7:30, though, Joseph decided it was "belly up to the bar" time and we were on for the next 7 hours. He finally slept for an hour and a half in the middle of the night before falling asleep this morning, as I mentioned above.

Whew.

Another day begins! The good news is that Adam is coming over this morning to hang out with Anne. He's going to pop her car seat into the car and bop around his errands this morning. She loves outings and so he's being a tremendous blessing.

But when they're this cute, you don't really mind the sleepless nights, do you??

This is his "What the heck are you doing?" face....I anticipate seeing this face quite a bit in a few years, no doubt.

A big yawn!